Clearing The Head

Today I went for a bit of a skate ski. My friends at the Stillwater Mountain Lodge & Nordic Center held their 2nd annual Broken Binding ski race; www.stillwatermtnlodge.com. There was a 48k category and I have wanted to ski that distance for several years. Early this winter I decided that their race would be the perfect opportunity. Sounds easy huh?

I have gone on long athletic outings in my past. I have run a couple marathons and1/2 marathons; I have run from Logan Pass to Waterton Park through Glacier National Park, etc. With those experiences, I have realized that when I sign up for organized events my head tends to get in the way of my fun. As today approached, I came up with a laundry list of why I was not going to participate in the race.
*I am in the “rotation” phase of my Genesis Transformation process www.genesistransformation.com and didn’t want to interrupt my cycle
*I have been feeling pretty great mentally, know my history and did not want to get lost in my head
*The race started at 10 and I did not want to spend an entire Sunday afternoon skiing
*I did not want to feel horrible at the end of it all…(these are just the a few of my reasons)

After going back and forth for days, I realized that alone was creating chaos in my head, exactly what I was trying to avoid. I signed up and decided I would stop skiing whenever I was ready, even if it was less than 48k, I would not get caught up in the competition and I would make sure I felt good the entire time.

The first of three out and back laps I spent in my head, analyzing how my body felt, wondering what it would feel like the next lap, if I could catch the person ahead of me, and so on. The 2nd lap I was able to relax and it was a beautiful day. I was in back of the pack and I didn’t really care, there are a lot of benefits to the back of the pack.
*It is quiet. I had a lot of time, the better part of 3 hours, to contemplate the day, my life, my goals, blog posts, etc.
*No one was breathing down my back or vice versa. The pressure to compete was only as big as I wanted it to be. I chose today to eliminate the pressure.
*When I had to pee, I didn’t have to worry about showing off my bum to the other skiers.
*No one had to listen to me talking to myself and making up songs.
*Meditation…see above…
The 3rd lap, well I was ready to take a break, but by then it did not matter. Once I finished the first two laps, the 3rd was just a formality, deep down I always know that my body can carry me long distances.

Tonight I have a few tight muscles but I skied 48 kilometers, something that has been in my head for several years! The sun was shining the entire time. I had a great opportunity to contemplate the amazing life that I live. I did not let my head talk me out of a really fantastic opportunity. There is a part of me that wishes I had pushed myself harder but more than that, I am so glad that I didn’t let all my “reasonable” excuses take charge. I spent a beautiful day outside, I got to use the body that I was given, I was witness to some amazing athletes and I had fun!

Thanks Stillwater, The Broken Binding was a great start to the week! You all put on a fantastic event!